John the Hypnotist

[joseyclosey]

It was opening night at the Orpheum, and the Amazing John was topping the

bill. People came from miles around to see the famed hypnotist do his

stuff.



As John took to the stage, he announced, "Unlike most stage hypnotists

who invite two or three people up onto the stage to be put into a trance,

I intend to hypnotize each and every member of the audience."



The excitement was almost electric as John withdrew a beautiful antique

pocket watch from his coat. "I want each of you to keep your eye on this

antique watch. It's a very special watch and has been in my family for

six generations."



He began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly

chanting, "Watch the watch, watch the watch, watch the watch...."



The crowd become mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth, light

gleaming off its polished surface. Hundreds of pairs of eyes followed the

swaying watch, until suddenly it slipped from the hypnotist's fingers and

fell to the floor, breaking into a hundred pieces.



"Sh *it!" said the hypnotist....



It took three weeks to clean the seats in the theatre.

[spearedum]

A crapy way to start a new funnys