Paddy

This is where you can share a funny story or joke. Adult humor allowed in large degree. Jokes that are considered more offensive than humorous will be deleted.
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joseyclosey
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Re: Paddy

Post by joseyclosey » Fri Mar 05, 2010 3:20 am

This is me Adam........

I just got banned from a Muslim clothes shop. All I asked for was a bomber jacket!!!!


or.....

Police are seeking a man who has so far stabbed 6 people to death with knitting needles all in the same area....He seems to be following some sort of pattern .



how about this one.....

I've just got myself one of those "Anti Bullying" wristbands.

I stole it off a fat ginger kid.


alternatively a bit more of a sophisticated one.....

Wayne Rooney told his wife Coleen that John Terry had shagged every England players partner except for one.

Coleen said

"I bet it's Posh Spice the stuck up cow!"


and to end on a real low, how about this one......

After having a nice 69er with his girlfriend, Norman remembered he had a dental appointment.
He was afraid the dentist would notice the smell on his breath, so he brushed his teeth, flossed, and gargled with Listerine.
As he arrived at the dentist he chewed on a packet of extra strong mints.
His turn came up & the dentist told him to take a seat.
Felling confident & relaxed, he opened his mouth wide.
The dentist got close, & said, "Did you have a 69er before you came here ?"

Norman said," Yes, but how did you know?, does my breath smell like fanny?"

The dentist said, "No. You've got a skid-mark on your forehead."


Joe :mrgreen:
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Aughnanure
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Re: Paddy

Post by Aughnanure » Fri Mar 05, 2010 3:47 am

I can't help it, it's catching.
Up at the local range some of us gardeners were talking about getting cuttings to grow and one of the chaps mentioned 'Rooting Powder'.
"No bloody good" said --------" I tried it and came out in a rash".
Self Defence is not only a Right, it is an Obligation.

Eoin.
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Woftam
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Re: Paddy

Post by Woftam » Sat Mar 06, 2010 8:59 pm

Is it very dark at the bottom of the pit, Graeme? :)
Yes, but its getting crowded down here now :loco:
The power of accurate observation is frequently called cynicism by those who don't have it.
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