Out of the Mouths of Babes
Posted: Mon Jan 16, 2006 6:26 pm
These have to be original and genuine - no adult is this creative!!
JACK (age 3) was watching his Mom breast-feeding his new baby sister.
After a while he asked: "Mom why have you got two? Is one for hot and
one for cold milk?"
MELANIE (age 5) asked her Granny how old she was. Granny replied she was
so old she didn't remember any more.
Melanie said, "If you don't remember you must look in the back of your
panties. Mine say five to six."
STEVEN (age 3) hugged and kissed his Mom goodnight. "I love you so much,
that when you die I'm going to bury you outside my bedroom window."
BRITTANY (age 4) had an ear ache and wanted a painkiller. She tried in
vain to take the lid off the bottle.
Seeing her frustration, her Mom explained it was a childproof cap and
she'd have to open it for her.
Eyes wide with wonder, the little girl asked: "How does it know it's me?
SUSAN (age 4) was drinking juice when she got the hiccups. "Please
don't give me this juice again," she said, "It makes my teeth cough."
D I (age 4) stepped onto the bathroom scale and asked: "How much do I
cost?"
MARC (age 4) was engrossed in a young couple that were hugging and
kissing in a restaurant.
Without taking his eyes off them, he asked his dad: "Why is he
whispering in her mouth?"
CLINTON (age 5) was in his bedroom looking worried. When his Mom asked
what was troubling him, he replied, "I don't know what'll happen with
this bed when I get married. How will my wife fit in?"
JAMES (age 4) was listening to a Bible story. His dad read: "The man
named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city but his
wife looked back and was turned to salt."
Concerned, James asked: "What happened to the flea?"
TAMMY! (age 4) was with her mother when they met an elderly, rather
wrinkled woman her Mom knew.
Tammy looked at her for awhile and then asked, "Why doesn't your skin
fit your face?"
The Sermon I think this Mom will never forget.... this particular Sunday
sermon..
"Dear Lord," the minister began, with arms extended toward heaven and a
rapturous look on his upturned face.
"Without you, we are but dust."
He would have continued but at that moment my very obedient daughter
(who was listening!) Leaned over to me and asked quite audibly in her
shrill little girl voice, "Mom, what is butt dust?"
JACK (age 3) was watching his Mom breast-feeding his new baby sister.
After a while he asked: "Mom why have you got two? Is one for hot and
one for cold milk?"
MELANIE (age 5) asked her Granny how old she was. Granny replied she was
so old she didn't remember any more.
Melanie said, "If you don't remember you must look in the back of your
panties. Mine say five to six."
STEVEN (age 3) hugged and kissed his Mom goodnight. "I love you so much,
that when you die I'm going to bury you outside my bedroom window."
BRITTANY (age 4) had an ear ache and wanted a painkiller. She tried in
vain to take the lid off the bottle.
Seeing her frustration, her Mom explained it was a childproof cap and
she'd have to open it for her.
Eyes wide with wonder, the little girl asked: "How does it know it's me?
SUSAN (age 4) was drinking juice when she got the hiccups. "Please
don't give me this juice again," she said, "It makes my teeth cough."
D I (age 4) stepped onto the bathroom scale and asked: "How much do I
cost?"
MARC (age 4) was engrossed in a young couple that were hugging and
kissing in a restaurant.
Without taking his eyes off them, he asked his dad: "Why is he
whispering in her mouth?"
CLINTON (age 5) was in his bedroom looking worried. When his Mom asked
what was troubling him, he replied, "I don't know what'll happen with
this bed when I get married. How will my wife fit in?"
JAMES (age 4) was listening to a Bible story. His dad read: "The man
named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city but his
wife looked back and was turned to salt."
Concerned, James asked: "What happened to the flea?"
TAMMY! (age 4) was with her mother when they met an elderly, rather
wrinkled woman her Mom knew.
Tammy looked at her for awhile and then asked, "Why doesn't your skin
fit your face?"
The Sermon I think this Mom will never forget.... this particular Sunday
sermon..
"Dear Lord," the minister began, with arms extended toward heaven and a
rapturous look on his upturned face.
"Without you, we are but dust."
He would have continued but at that moment my very obedient daughter
(who was listening!) Leaned over to me and asked quite audibly in her
shrill little girl voice, "Mom, what is butt dust?"