Milsurp After Hours

A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The

Officer says I clocked you at 80 miles per hour, sir."

The driver says, "Gee, officer I had it on cruise

Control at 60, perhaps

Your radar gun needs calibrating."

Not looking up from her knitting the wife says: "Now

Don't be silly dear, you know that this car doesn't have cruise

Control."

As the officer writes out the ticket, the driver

Looks over at his wife and growls, "Can't you please keep your mouth

Shut for

Once?"

The wife smiles demurely and says, "You should be

Thankful your radar detector

Went off when it did"

As the officer makes out the second ticket for the

Illegal radar detector unit,

The man glowers at his wife and says through

Clenched teeth, "Darn it, woman,

Can't you keep your mouth shut?"

The officer frowns and says, "And I notice that

You're not wearing your seat belt, sir. That's an automatic $75 fine."

The driver says, "Yeah, well, you see officer, I had

It on, but took it off when

You pulled me over so that I could get my license

Out of my back pocket."

The wife says, "Now, dear, you know very well that

You didn't have your seat

Belt on. You never wear your seat belt when you're

Driving."

And as the police officer is writing out the third

Ticket the driver turns to his wife and barks,

"WHY DON'T YOU PLEASE SHUT UP??"

The officer looks over at the woman and asks, "Does

Your husband always talk to you this way, Ma'am?"

(I love this part...)

"Only when he's been drinking"