The Ulimate guy quiz

[Woftam]

1. In the company of females, intercourse should be referred to as:

a) lovemaking

b) screwing

c) the pigskin bus pulling into tuna town

2. You should make love to a woman for the first time only after you've both shared:

a) your views about what you expect from a sexual relationship

b) your blood-test results

c) five tequila slammers

3. You time your orgasm so that:

a) your partner climaxes first

b) you both climax simultaneously

c) you don't miss SportsCenter

4. Passionate, spontaneous sex on the kitchen floor is:

a) healthy, creative love-play

b) not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend could ever agree to

c) not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend need ever find out about

5. Spending the whole night cuddling a woman you've just had sex with is:

a) the best part of the experience

b) the second best part of the experience

c) $100 extra

6. Your girlfriend says she's gained five pounds in the last month. You tell her that it is:

a) impossible - she looks too gorgeous!

b) not a problem, she can join your gym

c) a conservative estimate

7. You think today's sensitive, caring man is:

a) a myth

b) an oxymoron

c) a moron

8. Foreplay is to sex as:

a) appetizer is to entree

b) primer is to paint

c) a line is to an amusement park ride

9. Which of the following are you most likely to find yourself saying at the end of a relationship?

a) "I hope we can still be friends."

b) "I'm not in right now, please leave a message at the beep."

c) "Welcome to Dumpsville, population, YOU."

10. A woman who is uncomfortable watching you masturbate:

a) probably needs more time before she can cope with that sort of intimacy

b) is uptight and a waste of time

c) shouldn't have sat next to you on the bus in the first place

Score 1 point for every answer "a"

Score 2 points for every answer "b"

Score 3 points for every answer "c"

Your Score

10 points: You are a saint, a liar, or a eunuch.

11-20 points: You are an average joe. Good luck in the battle of the sexes.

21-30 points: You are a real man's man. Your fear of intimacy with women and your love of men's sports screams latent homosexuality. You need a nice she-male dominatrix to teach you respect.

31-40 You can't add

[DuncaninFrance]

Think I got 59

[Karl/Pa.]

The quiz is rigged. All answers are C.