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British humour...................

Posted: Sat Mar 12, 2011 5:13 pm
by DuncaninFrance
These are classified ads, which were actually placed in a U.K. newspaper:



FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER.

8 years old.

Hateful little bastard...

Bites!



FREE PUPPIES.

1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbour's dog.



FREE PUPPIES...

Mother is a Kennel Club registered German Shepherd.

Father is a Super Dog, able to leap tall fences in a single bound.



COWS, CALVES: NEVER BRED.

Also 1 gay bull for sale.



JOINING NUDIST COLONY!

Must sell washer and dryer £100.



WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE.

Worn once by mistake.

Call Stephanie.



**** And the WINNER is... ****



FOR SALE BY OWNER.

Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica, 45 volumes.

Excellent condition, £200 or best offer. No longer needed, got married, wife knows everything.



Statement of the Century

Thought from the Greatest Living Scottish Thinker--Billy Connolly.

"If women are so bloody perfect at multitasking, how come they can't have a headache and sex at the same time?"