Some old ones, some..................................
Posted: Sun May 13, 2012 3:37 am
> I changed my iPod's name to Titanic. It's syncing now.
>
> When chemists die, they barium.
>
> Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
>
> I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time.
>
> How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.
>
> I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.
>
> This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.
>
> I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.
>
> I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.
>
> They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Type-O.
>
> PMS jokes aren't funny, period.
>
> Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations.
>
> We're going on a class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there's no pop quiz.
>
> I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.
>
> The cross-eyed teacher lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils.
>
> When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.
>
> Broken pencils are pointless.
>
> I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.
>
> What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
>
> England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool .
>
> I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.
>
> All the toilets in New York 's police stations have been stolen. The police
> have nothing to go on.
>
> Haunted French pancakes give me the crêpes.
>
> Velcro.......... what a rip off!
>
> A cartoonist was found dead in his home. Details are sketchy.
>
> Venison for dinner again? Oh deer!
>
> The earthquake in Washington obviously was the government's fault.
>
> Be kind to your dentist. He has fillings, too.
>
> When chemists die, they barium.
>
> Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
>
> I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time.
>
> How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.
>
> I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.
>
> This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.
>
> I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.
>
> I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.
>
> They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Type-O.
>
> PMS jokes aren't funny, period.
>
> Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations.
>
> We're going on a class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there's no pop quiz.
>
> I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.
>
> The cross-eyed teacher lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils.
>
> When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.
>
> Broken pencils are pointless.
>
> I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.
>
> What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
>
> England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool .
>
> I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.
>
> All the toilets in New York 's police stations have been stolen. The police
> have nothing to go on.
>
> Haunted French pancakes give me the crêpes.
>
> Velcro.......... what a rip off!
>
> A cartoonist was found dead in his home. Details are sketchy.
>
> Venison for dinner again? Oh deer!
>
> The earthquake in Washington obviously was the government's fault.
>
> Be kind to your dentist. He has fillings, too.
