Call the Vet

[Karl/Pa.]

A dog lover, whose dog was a bitch and in heat, agreed to look after and house her neighbors' male dog while they were away on vacation. She had a large house and believed that she could keep them apart but, as she was drifting off to sleep she heard awful howling and moaning sounds, rushed downstairs and found the dogs locked together, in obvious pain and unable to disengage as so frequently happens when they copulate.

Unable to separate them and perplexed as to what to do next, although it was late, she called the vet, who answered in a very grumpy voice.

After she explained the problem to him, the vet said, “Hang up the phone and place it down alongside the dogs. I will then call you back and the noise of the ringing will make the male lose his erection and be able to withdraw.”

"Do you think that will work?" she asked.




“It just worked for me" he replied

[DuncaninFrance]

Back in the corner Karl, that one has a beard on it

[joseyclosey]

Made me snigger Karl

[Niner Delta]

This story is from the early years of my marriage, back in the early 1970's. One morning my wife and I were so engaged and the phone on the nightstand rang,
and in one of those things that seemed like a good idea at the time, I answered it.
It was my mother-in-law, a stern sort of humorless woman that was a deputy sheriff for 35 years.
She cheerfully asked, "Whatcha doin this morning?"
I couldn't stop myself and replied, "Screwing!". All I heard was a click and a dial tone.
My wife is screaming, "You idiot, who the hell was that?"
When I said, "Your Mother", I knew I was in for 'Rodeo Sex', you know, the kind where you just try to hang on for 8 seconds.
I didn't win the rodeo that day, and she barely spoke to me for the next week.
My wife finally got over it, and my mother-in-law never mentioned the phone conversation for the rest of her life.

Vern.