Thursday Ponderings

[Karl/Pa.]

My sex life is like a Ferrari....
I don’t have a Ferrarri.

If a man says he will fix it, he will fix it. There’s no need to remind him every six months or so.

I heard a guy complaining how expensive his wedding was going to be. He’s really going to be pissed when he finds out how expensive the divorce will be.

My mother-in-law is coming. I had to clean out half of my closet so she had a place to hang upside down to sleep.

NASA’s robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN, beer cans or porn. This proves once and for all that men are not from Mars,\.

I won an argument with a woman once .........in this dream I had.

If your wife or girlfriend ever asks, “ If I was to arrange a threesome for your birthday, which of my friends would you choose to join in?” Never EVER give her two names.

It’s really funny when my wife gives me the “silent treatment.” She thinks it is punishment.

If there was a way to read a woman’s mind, I don’t think I would want to. I hate shoes, shopping and gossip and I already know I’m annoying.

Men have feelings too. Right now I feel hungry.