A FEW MORE......

[Niner Delta]

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Still trying to get my head around the fact that 'Take Out' can mean food, dating, or murder.

The older I get, the more I understand why roosters scream to start their day

You know you're over 50 when you have 'upstairs ibuprofen' and 'downstairs ibuprofen.'

If only vegetables smelled as good as bacon.

I woke up this morning determined to drink less, eat right, and exercise.
But that was four hours ago when I was younger and full of hope.

Anyone who says their wedding was the best day of their life has clearly never had two candy bars fall down at once from a vending machine.

The biggest joke on mankind is that computers have begun asking humans to prove they aren't a robot.

When a kid says, "Daddy, I want mommy" that's the kid version of, "I'd like to speak to your supervisor."

Just once, I want a username and password prompt to respond "CLOSE ENOUGH."

Last night the internet stopped working so I spent a few hours with my family. They seem like good people.

If Adam and Eve were Cajuns they would have eaten the snake instead of the apple and saved us all a lot of trouble.

We celebrated last night with a couple of adult beverages... Metamucil and Ensure.

Weight loss goal: To be able to clip my toenails and breathe at the same time.

Some of my friends exercise every day.
Meanwhile, I am watching a show I don't like because the remote fell on the floor.

The pessimist complains about the wind.
The optimist expects it to change.
The realist adjusts his sails.

There's a fine line between a numerator and a denominator. Only a fraction of people will find this funny.

Reading gives us someplace to go when we have to stay where we are.

I have many hidden talents. I just wish I could remember where I hid them.

My idea of a Super Bowl is a toilet that cleans itself.

Exercise helps you with decision-making. It's true.
I went for a run this morning and decided I'm never going again.


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[Niner]

Seems like wisdom to me.

[Aughnanure]

Et moi, aussi.

[Niner Delta]

Et moi, aussi.

I had to google that one. ..

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