Thermometer

[Karl/Pa.]

When you have an 'I Hate My Job day'
(even if you're retired, you sometimes have those days).
try this Out:

Stop at your pharmacy and go to the thermometer section
and purchase a rectal thermometer made by Johnson & Johnson.

Be very sure you get this brand.

When You get home, lock your doors, Draw the
curtains and disconnect the phone so you will not be
disturbed.

Change into very comfortable clothing and sit in your
favourite chair. Open the package and remove the
thermometer.

Now, Carefully place it on a table or a surface
so that it will not become chipped or broken.

Now the fun part begins.

Take out the literature from the box and read it -
carefully.

You Will notice that in small print there is aStatement:

Every rectal thermometer made by Johnson & Johnson
is personally tested and then sanitized.

Now, close your eyes and repeat out loud five times,
'I am so glad I do not work in the thermometer quality
control department at Johnson & Johnson.'

HAVE A NICE DAY; AND REMEMBER, THERE IS ALWAYS
SOMEONE ELSE WITH A JOB THAT IS MORE OF A PAIN
IN THE ASS THAN YOURS!

Remember, If you haven't got a smile on your face and
laughter in your Heart....

maybe You should go and work for Johnson and Johnson!

Enjoy life now - It has an expiration date!

[Niner Delta]

A very busy Dr. starts to write something in a patients chart.

The nurse quietly says, "Ummm Dr., you're trying to write with
a rectal thermometer."

Dr. says, "Damn, I bet some asshole's got my ink pen."

.