Wal Mart

[Karl/Pa.]

I used to have a Labrador Retriever so I was buying a large bag of Purina at Wal-Mart one day and was in line to check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog. On impulse, I told her "no" but that I was starting The Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital the last time I was on the diet but I HAD lost 50 pounds before I awakened in the Intensive Care Unit with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is that you load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry plus the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try the diet again. I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a tall, biker who was behind the lady. Horrified, she asked me if I'd ended up in the ER because I'd been poisoned by the Purina. I told her "no." Actually I'd been sitting in the street licking my balls and a car hit me. I thought the biker was going to have to stagger out the door.

[Niner]

I didn't see the punch line coming.

[Tom-May]

Karl,

You owe me a new keyboard!!!!! (my old one is now full of coffee)

I didn't see the punchline coming either

[Aughnanure]

Nor did I, you ' rne xaoyape' *

(secret code : qwerty typed on a Dvorak board)

* term of endearment in the British and Australian Armed Forces.

[stripperclip]