sectioned laundry basket according to lights and darks. Walk to
bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way,
cover up any exposed areas. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror
- make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.. Get in the
shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah
and pumice stone.
Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added
vitamins. Washyour hair again to make sure it's clean. Condition your
hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced. Wash your face with
crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. Wash entire
rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. Rinse
conditioner off hair.
Shave armpits and legs. Turn off shower. Squeegee off all wet
surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex. Get out of shower.
Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in super
absorbent towel. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel
on head. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
How to shower like a man. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge
of the bed and leave them in a pile. Walk naked to the bathroom. If
you see wife along the way, shake genitals at her making the 'woo-woo'
sound. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of
your knob and scratch your arse. Get in the shower. Wash your face.
Wash your armpits. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse
them off. Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. Spend
majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. Washyour arse,
leaving those coarse hairs stuck on the soap. Wash your hair. Make a
Shampoo Mohawk.
Have a piss. Rinse off and get out of shower. Partially dry off.
Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub
the whole time. Admire knob size in mirror again. Leave shower
curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. Return to bedroom
with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, wave
genitals at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again. Throw wet towel on
bed.
<p>
Adam.
Why don't you visit .
