1) Large, loft-style apartments in New York City are well within the price range of most people--whether they are employed or not.
2) At least one of a pair of identical twins is born evil.
3) Should you decide to defuse a bomb, don't worry which wire to cut. You will always choose the right one.
4) Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communications system of any invading alien society.
5) It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts: your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.
6) When you turn out the light to go to bed, everything in your bedroom will still be clearly visible, just slightly bluish.
7) If you are blonde and pretty, it is possible to become a world expert on nuclear fission at the age of 22.
8) Honest and hard-working policemen are traditionally gunned down three days before their retirement.
9) Rather than wasting bullets, megalomaniacs prefer to kill their arch enemies using complicated machinery involving fuses, pulley systems, deadly gasses, lasers and man-eating sharks, which will allow their captives at least 20 minutes to escape.
10) All beds have special L-shaped cover sheets that reach the armpit level on a woman, but only to waist level on the man lying beside her.
11) All grocery shopping bags contain at least one stick of French bread.
12) It's easy for anyone to land a plane, providing there is someone in the control tower to talk you down.
13) Once applied, lipstick will never rub off--even while scuba diving.
14) You're very likely to survive any battle in any war unless you make the mistake of showing someone a picture of your sweetheart back home.
15) Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German or Russian officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German or Russian accent will do.
16) The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window in Paris .
17) A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating, but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.
18) If a large pane of glass is visible, someone will be thrown through it before long.
19) If staying in a haunted house, women should investigate any strange noises in their most revealing underwear.
20) Word processors never display a cursor on screen but will always say: “Enter Password Now.”
21) Even when driving down a perfectly straight road, it is necessary to turn the steering wheel vigorously from left to right every few moments.
22) All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they're going to go off.
23) A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.
24) If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you meet will know all the steps.
25) Police departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is their total opposite.
26) When they are alone, all foreign military officers prefer to speak to each other in English.
27) A car door is perfect to shield yourself from bullets.
What has watching the movies ever taught you?
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DuncaninFrance
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What has watching the movies ever taught you?
Duncan
What contemptible scoundrel has stolen the cork to my lunch? -- W.C. Fields
"Many of those who enjoy freedom know little of its price."
You can't fix Stupid, but you can occasionally head it off before it hurts something.
What contemptible scoundrel has stolen the cork to my lunch? -- W.C. Fields
"Many of those who enjoy freedom know little of its price."
You can't fix Stupid, but you can occasionally head it off before it hurts something.
Lots of additional ones are possible here
How about:
28. If in combat a soldier ever feels ," I'm going to get killed doing this", he should under no circumstance voice that thought. If he says it he's dead for sure in the next scene.
28. If in combat a soldier ever feels ," I'm going to get killed doing this", he should under no circumstance voice that thought. If he says it he's dead for sure in the next scene.
29) Should you become involved in a gunfight and run out of ammunition, and weapon picked up will be fully loaded, cocked and ready to fire.
30) Six shot revolvers hold 10 to 12 rounds, auto pistol magazines contain 20 to 30 rounds (unless the plot calls for the hero to run out of ammunition).
31) A shoulder wound will never hit bone or nerve clusters, the arm will often be usable later in the same scene, likewise, adislocated shoulder can be reset by a single pull (or by beating it against a hard vertical surface), there will be no pain other than that caused by the 'reset', there will be no swelling or loss of strength or mobility.
32) The more grotesque a man looks in drag, the more he will attract surrounding 'minor' characters
33) Obviously false facial hair is always convincing.
34) In warfare, an statement that the enemy couldn't or wouldn't do something results in them doing just that.
30) Six shot revolvers hold 10 to 12 rounds, auto pistol magazines contain 20 to 30 rounds (unless the plot calls for the hero to run out of ammunition).
31) A shoulder wound will never hit bone or nerve clusters, the arm will often be usable later in the same scene, likewise, adislocated shoulder can be reset by a single pull (or by beating it against a hard vertical surface), there will be no pain other than that caused by the 'reset', there will be no swelling or loss of strength or mobility.
32) The more grotesque a man looks in drag, the more he will attract surrounding 'minor' characters
33) Obviously false facial hair is always convincing.
34) In warfare, an statement that the enemy couldn't or wouldn't do something results in them doing just that.
The Truth IS Out There, The lies are in your head. (T. Pratchett - 'Hogfather'))